The Social Media Dilemma
It’s week two, and I have been wondering what to write about this week. No matter how hard I thought about it, nothing occurred to me. On the surface, I had nothing really interesting going on to talk about.
“I have to delve deeper into my life,” I told myself. “I have to explore the different levels of my life.” I kept telling myself.
As I sat down to introspect, I realised I don’t have many levels. Just what you would see if you met me, and that you won’t. I am not as complex a person as I, and many, would think I am. But all the while, I was proud of myself because I was trying to show up to write.
And then I happened to chat with a beleaguered colleague. He sent a random message on the office instant messenger: “Happy New Year, Mr. J.”
“Happy New Year, Smith. It’s good that you messaged. I wanted to check with you on your deliverables.” Who cares to ask how your holidays were and whether you had fun? Right?
“Sure, let me call you.” The moment he hit enter to that message, he also hit the call button. And I told myself that I would have been perfectly happy to receive an answer on chat instead of a call. But well, let’s socialise a bit.
The conversation started with renewed New Year’s wishes and inquiries about how much we ate and drank over the holidays. Surprisingly, I was doing the unnecessary talking. As we kept talking (over 15 minutes, mind you), we got into social media for some reason—something my beleaguered colleague mentioned that I kept thinking about later that day.
He said he has stopped using social media to share his life updates with the known and unknown world. Years back, he used to check in on FB and announce to the world his presence at an international airport lounge, an exotic location abroad, a fancy restaurant, etc. He stopped doing so cause it was affecting people close to him.
Bragging about the new places I visited was something even I used to do. It was akin to announcing to the world my newfound success and good fortune. A sort of uncalled-for show-off. Those “friends” on the platform would like the post and comment with oohs and aahs. Then there were some very good friends who would look at those posts and then reflect on their own unaffordability for such pleasures. I have been on both sides of the situation. As a disappointed viewer of such posts, I used to question my life (as if an airport lounge was life’s ultimate goal), but eventually, I was able to dream bigger. When I took my first international flight, I was tempted to show-off, and I did. I felt I had suddenly become part of an exclusive club. This continued until I realized I was showing-off way too much. There were friends and family members who felt somehow lesser than me. I had felt lesser than someone once, and it wasn’t my intent for anyone else to feel the same, but I did. I stopped my social media bragging from that point on. This was also the story of my beleaguered colleague.
This was years back. After a hiatus of a few years, I got back to social media. I abandoned Facebook, but I got onto Instagram. I post my photography work regularly. On Instagram stories, I share pictures and videos of many things, including the “good” things in life when they happen. I don’t think I overdo it. I share a good book I read and the beautiful waterfront I visited. However, This conversation made me wonder if I am still damaging people around me. As I share my little pleasures of life on Instagram, should I feel guilty about it? At this point in life, it is one of my few little pleasures. The intent to show off is non-existent. I know that, but does the viewer on the other side think so? And does that matter?